Hot:

Dream Of Detailed Things

I was making a fire rope, a rope made of inflammable things which I lit for some purpose that lacked meaning it seemed to me. My thinking was like a boy who is learning how to do things, whether these things are significant to adult life or not.

I also set fire to a piece of a railing on the stairs of this resort house for no purpose but to scrape it clean and put a new piece of wood on it and paint it the same color as its surrounds.

Not much purpose to this either except to do it.

Therefore I ask, what is relevant to a greater purpose in life and what is simply ‘doing things to do them but sine they have no greater context or purpose are a waste of ones precious and limited existence?

The Principle Of Greater Relevance

Let’s see what happens when I apply this principle to my ‘cancer situation.’

When I got the x-ray diagnosis I did not accept the doctors’ context, which was that this was a life-threatening emergency that the doctors and I had to act on almost immediately.

They assumed my motivation would be, like everyone else’s, they said, to quickly find out as much as possible, how serious it was, and what options I had.

I was declared ‘cancer victim.’

But I finally got the courage back to assert my values, not go along with theirs.

‘Hey, wait a minute,’ I said. ‘What proof have you that your system works. Cancer is called the number one killer in the world now. That indicates just the opposite that despite all your million dollar machines and your drugs and radiation people you treat still die of cancer. Why should I go your way, which apparently is debilitating to a lot of people?’

‘Don’t you want to be cured?’ says one doctor at the hospital, a supposed cancer expert.

Another says, ‘I know people who have done well with their treatments and their cancer is now in remission.’

It was useless to ask them for statistics. They either did not have them or refused to give them. They gave generalities about cases. They refused to say anything about my prognosis, my chances.

• Would I win the life lottery or not?

‘Just buy your ticket, Strephon. Just buy your ticket to your own expensive cancer treatments. We will take care of you. We know better. We are your doctors.’

Apparently I was not ready to go the way of most people, live or die. I developed my own context for living and dying when need be.

I chose a richer context that apparently had at least as good a chance of aiding my recovery as the doctors’ treatments.

What better way to be tested than challenged as to the quality and purpose of ones immediate life?

One must not panic, of course, and give up ones life to others who consider themselves the cancer experts.

If I keep the choice to decide my own life and treatment then I must make clear my context for living and dying to myself especially and to the feedback of others who choose to give me honest feedback and perspective.

Yes, now the race is on towards and early death, like happening now, or to a renewed life, however long and healthy this lasts.

The challenge is on. The Greater Context is chosen to go for that which is most likely to work, the natural treatments, the conscious way, the non invasive changes in lifestyle and body heath.

So far 35 days in with juice fasting. Weight loss has slowed down but I mostly feel vital but have to preserve my energy. Besides fasting only one big life activity a day extra when the energy feels there to do it, and this only for a limited time, like an hour at the most for a good walk in nature.

My context of meaning is also to write up for the blog what I am experiencing, and what choices I am making, for others to read and give feedback if they so desire.

My kind of therapy and consciousness work is to analyze and live consciously what is ones existential experience without unconscious attitudes and judgments whenever possible.

Another principle is: Reality is healing.

Yes, following my dream theme and actions here I can recall as a boy in a repressive boarding school with hardly any attention at all to my person I was in a sort of concentration camp, thus forced to do limited things on my own for challenge and growth.

I learned the ways of the woods. Learned to trap rabbits and skin them for mittens and a hat for the cold, cold winters of upper state New York. I learned to go out before dawn when the sap was running in the maple trees and gather the sap to make maple syrup with some of the other boys who wanted this also. I learned to excel in classroom work, except in spelling where the girls seemed to do a hundred times better. And so on.

I had to create boyhood challenges for myself. No one else cared. The Second World War was stirring up the world. There seems no time or resources for the children. We were a neglected generation coming out of an era in which the adults told children, ‘don’t speak until you are spoken to.’

Ever since I speak to be spoken to. Many listen but don’t take up the challenge to dialogue back.

The ears don’t listen as well as the tongue twangs, apparently with many people.

1. When you look at yourself in your present life, what is the context of purpose and meaning you live from in what you do?
2. Is there a balance?

related post

• Strephon I Am Affirmations
• Strephon's Cancer Health Report August 1, 2009
• $ 10 per year membership
• Membership Join Now-Values For
• Strephon's Photos